Yesh. It was a lil bit too high. But again.. its never too high or too difficult for me to handle. I have never been this transparent bout u in my blog. Not till today which i think i have to.

Kakak, Kathijah..
u both noe the story.Even though its just sixes and sevens but its to only both of u that i let it out to. Cause i trust u guys. And now im gonna make this factual. Very factual indeed.

I noe this gerl since 2005.She is very sweet,very soft-spoken.Laid back and down-to-earth kinda gerl.And i treasure her very much. Even though i was rejected and she got attached to the day she got engaged to the day her trust towards her fiancee gt lost totally but somehow she manage to get it back to this very day.My appreciation for her in my life never ever subside.

There were times where i tried to get away from her to carry on with my life and move on. Tried to keep myself as occupied as i can to forget bout her.. But in life.. sometimes no matter how hard u try to be as strong as u can be.. to continue with life as if u had not known her.. will not owaes turn out the way u tot it wud b. Cos of the simple equation = Ur Life Is NOT Complete Without Her. She is the reason u wake up every morning to be smiling and telling urself that that day is a brand new day. Her voice makes ur day even if u are late to go to werk. Her smile completes ur day no matter how sucky it had turn out to be. And more importantly, she gave u the extra motivation, support, key, strength to go thru the stormiest days and the darkest night all because.. She Completes Your LIFE.

TJs...
All Of u.. I REALLY MEAN ALL OF U! LISTEN UP!

U guys keep thinking and wondering.. y do i go out with many DIFFERENT GERLS each time theres an OUTING with all of u. Right? U guys think i change gerls like i change clothes and my undies? U guys keep thinking ALAMAK CHAT is the place where im looking for real love right? Picking up gerls and then the next time is anuder gerl and even go to the extend of me trying to take a fellow TJs Ex, NABILAH therefore getting the wrong impression of me. Right? Well Guys..U guys are totally wrong.

Im forever stuck in this situation. A situation whereby my love.. has been taken away. My love was stolen right before my very eyes. And she has taken me together with her. YES! i do haf certain exs and certain feelings to other gerls.I dun understand how my emotions goes about. Im not who i tink i am. I duno and will never get to noe why im reacting like this. I have a few failed realtionships in my journey and notably Hanies is the one u guys know about. And a few others.I do let out my feeling to them.But, What happen to her? What happen to them? It did not werk out. They owaes comes back to me stating we r just frens. NO more than that. And now they have moved on. They have their own lives.Me?

I just treat them as frens. Normal frens. Like i said in the top part of this entry, NO matter how i tried to forget her by doin it the drastic way and causing them to get the wrong impression of me, i still cant forget her.

Kakak,
U read the msgs. U read the MSN log book. U read every single chat he has with all those FUCKING BITCHES. Do u think he deserve her? U read the msgs sent on my hp. Wats ur take in this whole picture? Do u understand what im facing now? Do u noe how hard for me is it now to noe that he is taking advantage and has played with my lover's trust and feelings? To take all u guys's wrong impression and put that away cos at the back of my mind i noe u all dun understand my whole situation and u guys take it at the surface and not the whole fact into account? How am i supposed to feel? how?

Idah Mariyani,
U are attached. U r attached with Sadiq Adam. But u complete my life. Somehow, i swimming in danger waters. Ur family knows how close we are. And everytime my parents and ur parents forbids us to meet up, we still do. For u i duno what i shud sae but for me.. ur my special one. Do u noe how hard i had to swallow those pictures u took with him.. those stupid chat i had to read with heartbreaking feeling.. How i tot u make the right decision but it turned out to be wrong?

And do u noe how it felt when u gave me that treatment on the fone yesterday?I ALREADY HAD PLANS WITH THE TJS AND MY FAMIKY MEMBERS for ur birthday. U still duno me. U still duno how surprising i m to u. How i always try to make u happy. How i owaes want to make ur day.. every special day in ur life. And do u noe how i feel when i noe that i DONT GET ANITINK IN RETURN FOR ALL THIS I DID FOR U? Frankly im in a LOSING Situation. But still y do i out u priority to others? Feel me. Pls..? U expect me to come in ur 21 bdae. I did. I came with Nadiah. U wanted me to come on ur engagement day. I did not. Now, U expect me to come to ur wedding day. I duno yet. How can i come? Tell me? Tell me how n wat m i to feel seein u bersanding with the guys who ask for SEX IN THE NET? Who hurt u deeply? Who stole u away from me???


Tell me guys. TELL ME. those who has ways to make me forget this special treasure in my life.. I welcome u to come to me and tell me. Straight In The Face.


Ayunn..
this may be ur first time reading my blog. PLS TELL ME WAT TO DO BABE.


PEOPLE..
Im in love with a gerl who is ENGAGED.
U guys Understand that?

♥ Romance