Ku biarkan waktu truslah berputar
Mencintai kamu penuh rasa sabar
Meski sakit hati ini kau tinggalkan
Ku ikhlas untuk bertahan
Cintaku padamu begitu besar
Namun kau tak pernah bisa merasakan
Meski sakit hati ini kau tinggalkan
Ku ikhlas untuk bertahan
Kau meninggalkan ku tanpa perasaan
Hingga ku jatuh air mata
Kekecewaanku sungguh tak berarah
Biarkan ku harus bertahan
Jangan Pernah kau cuba untuk berubah
Tak relakan yang indah hilanglah sudah
Ku relakan yang indah hilanglah sudah

---

.Was out one fine night...
.With the rest...
.In the car...
.It came on air...
.The whole group sang the song...
.Except me...
.I sat at the rear right side of the car...
.Listening to them singing to the song...
.For once it seems that they were feeling the song...
.I heared their voices...
.I closed my eyes...
.She came to mind...
.It was as if i was talking to her ...
.Wif the lyrics of the song...
.N for ONCE after many times listening to that song...
.I FELT THE LYRICS & THE SONG...
.Deeply...
.Emotionally...
.It reflects on me...
.I was holding back tears...
.Its a moment where i dun wan it to go away...
.I want to treasure that moment...
.I want it to happen again...
.I hope u too felt the same way...
.If u dun...
.Den i pray one day u will fell the same way...
.As i did...
.Yesterday...

---

I had a VERY VERY bad experience yesterday
One that i will not forget
Never
Reach back home at around 1 plus
Once i park the bike
I walked a longer distance than normal
And i recite short verses from the holy Quran
Bcos i felt something was following me home
But i brush it away
Cos i tot it was the chills from the cold air
I stand in front of the door
Slit the key in
Unlock it
Then once the door open
The smell was unbearable
It was so smelly
Very smelly indeed
I recite the verses again
This time i look around my surrounding
As i was on the phone that time
I on the loudspeaker
And literally shouted while talking to a fren
Hoping that she would pick up any weird sounds or things lyk that
I on almost every light in the house
At this point of time
I felt i did a mistake
And my gut feeling never let me down
From the pitch to studies to private life
I went in straight into the toilet
Took out my clothings
Wif my Hp
Still having that conversation
Wif frequent stops along the way
Bathe
Took wudhuk
I put all my clothings into the wshing machine
Close it shut
I make my way to my room
And my bro is not asleep yet
But i felt something on my back
Its not heavy
But its more to the goosebumps on my back
And my neck
And my head
I felt scared
Its not the normal scared
But its more to being scare and nervous
Its as if i just commited a murder or a crime
And will be punish or thrown into Changi Hotel
Its one of the weirdest feeling
Even until now as i type this to update
I felt the goosebumps
The chills
The scaredness
Its as if the thing in holding on to my back
Like a piggy-back kinda thing
But at some point
I dun feel it
But when the feeling come
I feel like crying
And i feel alot of emotions running in me
I duno
I tried to fight all this
By reciting and reciting and being normal
Cos in the past few days
I couldnt get enough sleep
N im worried
Very worried
Cos my mom is very very sensitive in this kinda issue
Called Kakak
Then i remember a fren
So i called her
And told her
She was ready to help me
But at that point of time
I was feeling so scared
I wasnt thinking straight
I rejected her help
Put down the phone
I woke dad up cos she told me something that made me very scared
I told him the truth
He looked at me
Shocked
He told me to not stop reciting
Came out wif a bottle of water
He sprayed it on me
On my back and neck and head
And then sprayed it to the whole house
I felt sucky cos at that time it was 3 plus
And he has to wake up early in the morning
To go to werk
And there i was disturbing his sleep
I cant help it
He is the nearest form of help i could get
He calm me down
Slowly
The feeling went away
I asked for more of the water
He sprayed in on my hand and i sprayed on my whole body
I felt relieved
But after he left for his room
It came back
This time more stronger
I knocked on his room
And he bring me to the kitchen
Took out a bottle
Filled it with water
And started reciting
After which i drank the whole bottle wif my eyes closed
Trying to fight it
As i felt the water went down my throat
The feeling went away tremendously
As i was watching England Vs Spain
He told me to off the TV and go to sleep
After drinking the water
I did not
Cos i tot i wanted to go Solat Subuh with him at the mosque
But in the end
He told me to rest at home and get some sleep
I cant sleep
So i just lay in bed
And on my HI-FI radio in my room (I tot the radio wasnt werking)
Wait till Azan
I prayed
All the while, the feeling is still there
I felt as if somebody is watching on me
And piggy-back me even when im laying down
Its very weird
Im scared
But i dun feel any load
Or pain
I can stand up straight
And walk normally
Hopefully it will go away.
Insya-Allah




*i left a msg for u.. but no reply
Ouh well...

♥ Romance